"Dear Bi Men: A Black Man's Perspective on Power, Consent, Breaking Down Binaries, and Combating Erasure"
An unapologetic guide for readers who are Black, masc, and bi--unlearning biphobia, coming out, combatting erasure, and embodying your whole self
Through cutting social analysis, personal stories, and need-to-know advice, Dear Bi Men reclaims bi+ visibility in a culture of erasure--and unapologetically centers Blackness in a practical and deeply researched guide to navigating life, work, and relationships as a Black bi+ man.
Popular representation of bi and pansexual men is growing, but we're not there yet: It's mostly white. It collapses bisexual identity into tired, hypersexualized tropes. And it fails to interrogate the deeply entrenched stereotypes that insist: You're confused. You just don't know you're gay. You're greedy. You must be great in bed.
Author, peer counselor, and creator of #bisexualmenspeak J.R. Yussuf pushes back against these stigmas and misconceptions, exploring how white supremacy reinforces biphobia and dictates what society thinks it means to "be a man." He contextualizes discourse around queerness and bisexuality within a larger framework that honors readers' intersecting identities. And he offers deeply practical advice, sharing how to:
- Unlearn internalized biphobia and homophobia
- Navigate an increasingly hostile digital landscape
- Think about coming out: who to tell, why to tell them, and how to do it
- Fight back against erasure and stigma
- Navigate sex, dating, partnerships, marriage, friendship, and work
- Understand your bi+ sexuality through a political lens
- Process Black bi+ representation
Rich with personal narratives, insightful analysis, and practical advice, this book is a powerful resource for Black bi+ men to reclaim their identity, counter biphobia, and get empowered--and an offering to all readers looking to fight back against the erasure and dehumanization wrought by patriarchy.
J.R. Yussuf is the award-winning author of The Other F Word: Forgiveness and creator of the hashtag #BisexualMenSpeak for bisexual+ men and masculine-identified folks to have the space to speak for themselves and talk about how being bisexual+ impacts the way they move through the world. Yussuf maintains a podcast called Let's Heal Already, revolving around mental wellness, self-improvement, and emotional literacy. Yussuf secured a peer support certification from the Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective (B.E.A.M.) and has used his training to support countless Black bisexual/pansexual men. Yussuf's writing has appeared in Men's Health Magazine, Thrive Global, Black Youth Project, Queerty, Queer Majority, Positively Positive, The Good Men Project, Escarp, Instigatorzine, and The CultureLP.